Last week I shared one of the pleasures of volunteering at the
market – getting to visit the farms. Little did I know that an extraordinary
pleasure was waiting for me and market volunteer Marilyn Thornberry the very
next day. We were invited to a Xa Noob Ncoos/Tsoog Laug. Yes, it was a new one
on us, too, and please don’t ask me to pronounce it. Our long-time vendor and
friend Der Hang Lor (photo left) invited us to this special party given in her and her
husband’s honor by their children. Although I was scheduled to drive to Fort
Worth to visit my parents, I could tell by the invitation that I needed to at
least make an appearance at the party before heading south. It was a formal
invitation, printed and embossed and included the following: 2 pm Doors Open, 3 pm “Khi tes”, 4 pm Dinner,
6 pm Entertainment, Midnight Doors close. Now that’s a party!
The invitation also said “proper attire required” and as we got
ready I told my husband Phil that I was pretty sure that didn’t include the
shorts he was wearing. He changed to slacks and a polo. When we arrived at the
Neosho Civic Center I turned to him and said “uh oh, you’re still underdressed
in a big way.” In the lobby were Der’s
three sons, all in suits, giving each guest a special drink. At the door to the
banquet area were Der’s daughter-in-laws pinning a silk rose on every guest. They
were dressed in long silk and satin brocade dresses with sashes over one
shoulder, beautifully made up and bedecked with jewelry. Once inside we saw
round tables with seating for about 250 people, all of whom were equally
beautifully dressed, even the children. The tables were covered with white
cloths and broad golden satin runners. Each table held a tall pedestal topped
by a floral arrangement. The chairs were draped in white covers with matching
golden satin sashes.
As soon as we stepped through the door, Nhao Hang, Der’s
sister-in-law and fellow vendor at the market, spotted us and took us to a
table at the front. Der and her husband, Nhia, appeared almost immediately, exchanging
hugs and handshakes with us and much to our surprise sitting down at the table
on either side of us.
Though they obviously hoped we could stay till midnight, they
graciously accepted that we would have to leave on our trip before long and insisted
that we eat dinner early. The appetizer tables were covered with fresh fruits
and desserts – some of which were familiar like cupcakes, some of which I’d
never seen like silken slabs of neon colored firm puddings.
Directly in front of the stage was a huge table loaded from
edge to edge, primarily with fruits but also bearing two of the four pigs roasted for the event and other ceremonial
items like two roasted chickens complete with heads and feet and the tail of
the beef roasted beef for the event. A niece had carved melons into bouquets
with the unpeeled section serving as the vase and the peeled section carved
into patterns. I asked Nhia the purpose of the table which was so loaded that
no one could possibly eat on it. It was to be used for the Khi tes, a ceremony where
each child gave their parent the end of a string keeping hold of the other end while
giving a formal speech of thanks (below).
I also asked Nhia about the entertainment planned. He said that
there would be dancing and that he and Der had never danced before in their
life but their children had informed them they were dancing tonight! The entertainment also included a
professional Hmong group from Alabama.
The party is, as best I could tell, a traditional event that
children give for their parents when they are old – Der and Nhia are younger
than me (which I don’t think of as being all that old). The age of celebration
is probably a traditional one based on the shorter life spans of an earlier age.
We were able to stay for the first of the ceremonies which
involved all nine children and their spouses standing on stage while Nhia gave
a very long talk, which I assume was about their family and their family history
in the Hmong language, which made sense since Phil and I were the only
non-Hmong in the room. There were several touching moments that had pretty much
everyone in tears, including me even though I couldn’t understand a word. Then
Der gave a much shorter talk. I'm guessing that Nhia had already pretty much said
it all.
By that time our departure was overdue so with hugs and thanks
we headed for the door only to run into Marilyn and our friend Cindy LaMere
walking in the door. After they were appropriately pinned with silk roses and given
their special drink I took them to the places of honor that we had vacated. Later
Marilyn told me that she had never had so much fun in her life. They stayed for
four hours of music and dancing.
It was the party of a lifetime, which is exactly what it was
meant to be.
We market volunteers are so blessed to know these kind and
generous people. And we’re all lucky to enjoy the fruits of their labor.
Today at the market Extension folks will demonstrate and sample
Fresh Peach Smoothies. (Yes, I said it – Peaches! We’re expecting two truckloads from Pates
Orchard today.) Patrick Byers and Shon
Bishop with Extension will answer gardening questions. Granny Shaffers at the
Market serves home style chicken and noodles, chicken salad sandwiches and
fruit plates. The Sours play traditional music.
Tomorrow, the Civil Air Patrol serves breakfast. We always
enjoy working with these teenagers looking forward to a future in flight, particularly
the Air Force. William Adkins performs. Don’t forget to drop a dollar or two in
his tip jar. He comes a long way from Arkansas for the meager amount the market
pays. Market Lady Susan Pittman will demonstrate and sample Summer Black Bean
Pasta Salad.
Tuesday, of course, we’ll have music and lunch and short lines.
A week from tomorrow is our annual Tomato Contest. If you’d
like to enter, stop by the information table for an entry form or go to our web
site, webbcityfarmersmarke.com, for details.
